Today i was offered to have cyber sex with someone and it is still a little awkward to me. I didnt really understand how anyone could get off and orgasm from text. I would much rather have the real thing. I do understand that sometimes you just dont want to be bothered by someone but hell watch a porno. Sex through an instant message is a little too weird to me. But hey whatever gets you off. So i looked at some good cyber sex convo's online and here is a good one. Check it out! I put the best parts in bold.
bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKate: Who are you?
bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
bloodninja: And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKate: Haha! OK DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce. bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower... bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house. **pause** DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
bloodninja: I'm on my way now though
DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
bloodninja: How did you know?
bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door.... DirtyKate: What the f**k?
DirtyKate: You perverted piece of s**t
LMAO That is so weird!
I have not done a true blog blog that gets filed under 'Sex Tips' so i felt it was time. I thought that this time I would right about something I was indeed going through and that is getting over a past relationship.
For me it is a bit of a time to rejoice. It is kind of sad because hes gone but I am single and free to be me which is really nice. Its been quite a while since I were single. We are always " I Need A Man" but i realized I do not need a man.
Don't Rethink Your Decision:
All the good times you had together is going to make you wonder why you broke up. There is a reason you broke it off and it cannot be taken off now. It is common you are going to romanticize about the good parts but its over. You need to accept the situation and move on.
Keep Your Distance:
If you guys are friends take a break from each other right after the breakup. This means no phone calls, no texts, no emails, no instant messages! This also means [for the frisky type] no sex. This isn't forever, just until you are able to converse with the person and have a strictly platonic relationship.
Accept Your Pain:
It is okay to be hurt and sad by the situation. I myself am a strong person but of course I still feel pain. Just because you are gone it doesn't mean you are a bad person. You are not the only person out there that made a mistake.
Think It Through:
Think about every reason why you two broke up. Consider all the bad and all the good. Understand you enjoyed each others company but it is time you moved on. If you two weren't on the same page the entire time it was going to end eventually.
Talk To Friends:
Do not block everyone out. You need people who love you around you. Of course the best person for that is friends. Friends are going to give you that support you need to get over your relationship. They are going to show you that you are a worthwhile person.